Don't Lead The Witness!

Written by Gerard on Thursday 8 February 2007

Jake's been in funny form this evening, unsettled in his bed and crying out loud. Nothing we can do seems to console him and whenever I try to deal with him he kicks and screams. Just wants his mum at the moment.

Anyway, a bit earlier on, I realised that he might be hungry and Lisa thought he might have stomach cramps. Well, he didn't bother to eat his dinner, did he? Could be trapped wind or something, so we brought him downstairs for a drink of milk and a piece of toast.

While I slaved over a hot toaster, Lisa sat on the dining room sofa, tentatively asking Jake what was wrong.

"Are you hungry?" (nods head)

"Are you thirsty?" (nods head) 

"Are you sick?" (nods head)

"Are you sore?" (nods head - are you detecting a pattern here?)

"Is your head sore? Your belly? Your bum?" The line of questioning looked like it was going to last forever. I said to Lisa, "You're leading the witness. Ask him what's wrong, but don't put ideas in his head." And just to prove my point - because we're both irritating like that - I asked him "Jake. Do you have leprosy?"

(nods head)